Child-free woman from Bristol slams people for Taylor Swift 'childless' comments

Hayley Watkins, 42, made the choice not to have children two decades ago because she didn't want kids.

She said she encountered many people who found the decision "a bit strange" or suggested she would change her mind - but she never did.

Now, in the aftermath of a controversial op-ed saying Taylor Swift is "not a good role model" because she is "unmarried and childless" at 34, Hayley has spoken out.

An op-ed by Newsweek writer John MacGhlionn said: "At 34, Swift remains unmarried and childless, a fact that some might argue is irrelevant to her status as a role model.

"But, I suggest, it's crucial to consider what kind of example this sets for young girls."

Hayley, from Clifton, Bristol, slammed that attitude for perpetuating "a real trad-wife culture" - and any woman who doesn't follow that path is threatening.

She said: "People who hold that attitude would never want to admit it, but it's about control.

"If a woman has children, most of her energy goes into raising kids.

"The fact she doesn't have children means she won't be under control in that way.

"And people who hold this ideology value the 'young, attractive but powerless woman' - they see having children as them 'putting a baby into' someone.

"The fact that Taylor Swift hasn't had a child means, in the eyes of these people, that no man has chosen her to do that with.

"But there's no question over whether she has chosen anyone either - or whether she even chooses parenthood."

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Hayley said it's up to people to decide their own role models - and she shouldn't be expected to follow a certain path anyway.

But she questioned the idea that Taylor Swift is a 'bad role model' to her fan base - a large proportion of which is made up of teenagers and young women.

Hayley said: "For some of us, not having children is a part of our life. Why not share that with the younger generation?

"There are already lots of role models out there who do have children.

"On top of that, what harm is anyone expecting a group of teenagers to come to, seeing a woman who doesn't have kids?

"Wouldn't it be more harmful for them to decide to all have children, right now, than to not?

"A role model, to me, has qualities or characteristics I want to emulate myself - as far as Taylor Swift's business acumen goes, I think she should be admired.

"Whether she has children or not doesn't change that."

Hayley, a psychotherapeutic counsellor who works closely with child-free women, also added that anyone who feels Taylor Swift is a bad role model for not being a mother should consider the impact closer to home.

She said we don't know whether it was a decision Swift made not to have kids - or whether she is unable.

Hayley said: "It's insulting to people you do know, even some of our closest friends - while you're saying this, how do you know someone close to you doesn't want a child more than anything, but can't?

"You never know if you're stepping on something painful - and why people do or don't have children is not your beeswax.

"I've spoken to so many women over the last year who are in unbelievable pain because they can't have a child.

"I wouldn't wish that on my worst enemy."

She added: "Why are we discussing whether Taylor Swift being 'childless' is a bad thing anyway?

"It's sexist and small-minded.

"We wouldn't do it to a man, so why are we doing it to a woman?"